Why is it hard to attract the right partner?

We take a closer look at six major reasons about why it might be hard for you to manifest an intimate longterm relationship.

1. You have not gotten over the past

When a relationship ends, in addition to the necessary time to process emotions, it is necessary to do some conscious processes to commemorate the completion of this cycle in our lives. When a person important to us leaves our life, it leaves an imprint, if we do not honor it with the gratitude of the heart for all the gifts that, pleasant or not, he left with his passing, then this imprint leaves a wound open , which is up to us to heal. It is up to me to forgive the past, please the ghosts, and heal the wounds of the “victim” I may once have felt myself to be.

2. I feel on a subconscious level that I don’t deserve love

Wherever and whenever love is missing, it’s because deep inside, even if I don’t feel it or see it clearly, I feel that I don’t deserve love. The mind operates on two levels (for ease of explanation), the level of beliefs and the level of thoughts/ideas. The belief level is much deeper and very often we do not know what material is recorded, which very often repeats itself constantly because it comes from the source of my being. When I have difficulty in relationships it is because part of this deeper level in my mental-emotional body believes that I am not worthy of love. Usually this belief comes from some trauma that I have forgotten that I have, but which has left its echo in my subconscious. Part of relationship healing is this change of “language” that the subconscious uses, which I can achieve with psychotherapy, energy healing, meditation, prayer, spiritual work, etc.

3. I am stuck in some pattern of men or women so I repeat the “same” relationship every time

When I haven’t learned the lesson that a relationship came to offer me (although it should be more correct to say that it was invited by a part of me that wishes to be reunited with me , usually in a similar way to the way he disconnected) then I will usually invite a similar or even stronger relationship than the previous one.

The relationship itself doesn’t matter as much as the belief system that invites the respective individuals to reflect back to me what it is that I mistakenly believe I’m missing (at a higher level we are perfect beings, any belief to the contrary is delusional).

4. I make superficial relationships in general (friends, colleagues, family, with myself)

I can’t go deep in relationships, as soon as I feel my heart opening or being emotionally vulnerable or vulnerable to the other person, I close down, i.e. avoid him/her, overwork, do abuses or return to obsessive habits (netflix, alcohol, dating, etc.). The issue is not the other person, but that the vulnerability I feel makes me feel threatened instead of open to love.
The threat comes from some previous experience of frustration where by removing myself from the relationship (or keeping it on the surface) I avoid it happening again. I’m basically protecting myself, but as a result I live on a more superficial level and I’m more likely to feel lonely.

5. I avoid feeling my emotions

Similar to the above reason for difficulty in relationships, avoiding feeling often results in not even knowing what I’m feeling. It’s quite interesting how the discomfort of the emergence of unpleasant feelings can make me numb – that is, so distant from myself that I don’t even know what’s happening to it.

In this case it is important that I find the strength to understand that I am in a state of disassociation and start using tools therapeutically so that I can start to feel my emotions and therefore understand myself better.

6. I focus on satisfying short-term rather than long-term needs (eg sex instead of love)

I’m so tired of not having a partner that I retreat so I can’t stay in the relationship for long as it’s not right for me in the long run (we don’t match or we’re connected by our lack, trauma, pain, loneliness, the need for companionship). But I can stay even if the relationship is completely inappropriate, with an even greater negative impact on body, mind, soul and spirit. When I go into a relationship without the motivation of love/abundance, usually the reason I do so comes from a place of lack (fear, envy, lust, self-pity, etc.)

The journey of relationships in this life experience is vital to understanding the relationship with self, with our own higher self (soul) and by extension, with God (or Goddess, or All) Himself. It is important to constantly investigate ourselves in order to find long-term solutions. Like love…

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